You don't get to decide what your life means to anyone else.

No one ever tells you how much a heartbreak physically hurts. How it literally feels like you’ve been kicked down the stairs. How you can’t swallow. How every muscle aches. How your heart lurches inside you like it’s been poisoned. Nobody tells you that.

What’s it like to have sisters?

Will my sisters hate me?

Will I hate my sisters?

How does it feel when someone is your sister?

Why did someone want my sisters instead of me?

How do you talk to your sisters so they like you?

“It took us fifteen years to find each other, but we still did! And sometimes, family hurts each other. But after that’s done you bandage each other up, and you move on. Together. You’ve got us now, like it or not, and we’ve got you.”

« Well, she’s kind of annoying. » Grace said. She hadn’t even known it was true until she said it. « She kept interrupting me, she only talked about herself, and she was sort of rude, too, honestly. »

« Honey? » Grace’s mom said.

« Yeah. »

« Welcome to having a sister. »

“Sometimes Joaquin wondered if he has been the worst baby in the world if his own mother didn’t even want to come to see him.”

“It wasn’t that their parents’ fights got violent or anything like that; words could shatter harder than a glass breaking against a wall, hurt more than a fist plowing through teeth.”

“Grace thought bitterly, boys who get girls pregnant are heroes and girls who get pregnant are sluts.”

“That’s what parents do. They catch you before you fall. That’s what family is.”

“There are some things that are just as strong - no - stronger than love potions you know. Like real feelings.”

“Listen ! The Hate U – the letter U – Give Little Infants Fucks Everybody. T-H-U-G L-I-F-E. Meaning what society give us as youth, it bites them in the ass when we wild out.”

“What’s the point of having a voice if you’re gonna be silent in those moments you shouldn’t be?”

“A black person gets killed just for being black, and all hell breaks loose. I’ve tweeted RIP hashtags, reblogged pictures on Tumblr, and signed every petition out there. I always said that if I saw it happen to somebody, I would have the loudest voice, making sure the world knew what went down. Now, I am that person, and I’m too afraid to speak.”

“People like us in situations like this become hashtags, but they rarely get justice. I think we all wait for that one time though, that one time when it ends right. Maybe this can be it.”

Mais le monde entier est contre nous, m’assure-t-il dans un murmure. Comment pourrions-nous lutter contre le monde entier ?

– Il n’y a ni loi ni barrière pour les sentiments. Nous pouvons nous aimer aussi profondément que nous en avons envie. Notre amour, Maya, personne ne pourra jamais nous le prendre.

– Si je n’avais pas mis un terme à cette folie, tu te rends compte de ce qui serait arrivé ? Ce n’est pas simplement répugnant, Maya, c’est interdit par la loi, bordel !

Ce moment restera un secret honteux que nous devrons conjurer jusqu’à la fin de nos existences, jusqu’à ce que, desséché par les ans, il s’effrite et devienne une vague réminiscence, à l’instar de la poudre laissée par les ailes d’un papillon sur une vitre, le spectre d’un épiphénomène qui ne s’est peut-être jamais produit et existe uniquement dans notre imagination.

“You can pretend none of this ever happened when you leave, or pretend you had no choice. I don’t give a fuck what you have to tell yourself to sleep at night. For the next two weeks you belong to me.”

“This isn’t a joke. This is life or fucking death, Lily. I am trying to save you.”

"Save me from who?"

"From me, darlin'.”

“I'm sorry."

"Not yet, but you will be.”

(...) I just don’t know what we’re doing, but the way he kisses me feels like I’m his crack and he gets high on me. As soon as we hit the bed, his mouth fuses with mine and doesn’t let go. His arms hold me pinned to his body as if I ground him. I feel like his anchor, and he feels as powerful and exciting as a free fall.

Durant la première rencontre entre Remy & Brooke <3 :

The crowd goes crazy, calling all the way to the lobby, “Riptide! Riptide!” and then they fall completely
quiet, as though something unscripted has just happened. I wonder about the eerie silence when pounding footsteps echo at my back. A warm hand engulfs mine, and the touch frissons through me as I’m spun around with surprising
force.
“What the…” I gasp in confusion, and then stare into a sweaty male chest, and up into glowing blue eyes. My senses reel out of control. He’s so close the scent of him tears through me like a shot of adrenaline.
“Your name,” he growls, panting, his eyes wild on mine.
“Uh, Brooke.”
“Brooke what?” he snaps out, his nostrils flaring.
His animal magnetism is so powerful I think he just took my voice. He’s in my personal space, all over il, absorbing it, absorbing me, taking my oxygen, and I can’t
understand the way my heart is beating, the way I stand here, shivering with heat, my entire body focused on the exact spot his hand is wrapped around me.

When he glances at my lips. When he tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear. I know we’re just sending our adrenals to hell, doing this. Keeping the output of this lust is just not healthy, but I can’t stop him. In fact I want more. I want him to stop because we’re suffering and I want him to go on until I lie dead in his arms, burnt to ashes from my want of him.
I want him. Every hour, minute, and second.
I wanted him that first night, when I tried to brainwash myself and pretend I didn’t. And now I want him like I want to breathe, to eat, to live a happy life, to see my sister again, to be satisfied in my job. I want him like I want to live my present without any fear whatsoever of what may, or may not, happen tomorrow.

I can’t explain why I’m so nervous at the thought of seeing him again.
I think I like him, and I dislike that I do.
I think I want him, and I hate that I do.

She'd sent me to this trip to find myself and yet I'd found so much more. I wanted to be able to express to her that it wasn't just heartbreak. I'd make memories of a lifetime that I wouldn't trade for the world.